How to learn to relax in different situations? I don't know how to relax.

Probably everyone has heard the expression "If you want to live, be able to spin!" This is the motto of those who want to succeed in this world - to earn as much money and fame as possible. However, only a few are aware of the fact that from such a "rotation" you can lose all strength and health. Especially if a person does not know how to relax after work, or does not understand why it needs to be done.

But timely rest is the key to success. Believe me, any sane psychologist will confirm this. So let's talk about what to do if you are tired: how to relax quickly? What techniques should you use? What exactly should you avoid?

This crazy world

We should start with a small rhetorical digression. We all know that in modern world you need to be better than others in order to defend your place under the sun. Indeed, in almost all areas, tough competition reigns, which pushes people to constant competition. Note that this is quite normal, since it was precisely the predisposition to competition that allowed humans to win in the interspecific evolutionary race.

However, this does not mean that constant competition will lead a person to a better future. For any battle you need strength, otherwise it will be lost in advance. Alas, our body and mind cannot be in good shape all the time - they need rest to recharge. If we speak in the language of metaphors, then a person can be compared to an engine. If it is constantly used at full capacity, it will quickly break down and no longer be of use.

But, unlike a car, a living organism after a "breakdown" will not be so easy to repair, and sometimes even impossible. Therefore, the first thing people should realize is that they all need a good rest. It doesn't matter how badly they want to get another promotion or achieve their goal.

Fatigue: what is it like?

Before you learn to relax, you need to learn that there are two absolutely different kinds fatigue: physical and mental. The first is characteristic of those who work with their hands, and the second is characteristic of intellectuals. In addition, for some people, these two types of exhaustion coexist, since the specificity of their work leads to this. For example, the profession of a kneader includes both intense physical activity and constant concentration of attention.

But back to our topic. The bottom line is that you cannot relieve both fatigue in the same way. After all, what helps with physical exhaustion is not always suitable for raising morale. Therefore, let's first look at the methods that allow the body to relax, and then move on to those that calm the soul.

30 minutes of calm

All of us, going home after a hard day, think about how to relax and put ourselves in order. At such moments it seems that your body is about to stop moving and simply fall to the ground with a dead weight. We think that now we will be well understood by those who work in factories from morning till night and are engaged in hard physical labor. And the only thing you want on such days is to fall into a warm bed and fall asleep until the next morning.

Alas, such bliss is available only to a few. After all, one has only to come home, as a whole mountain of daily duties falls on us.

Therefore, most people, after returning home, first of all begin to rush home chores. And this is their mistake. Because of such actions, our body is exposed to great stress, because in fact it is notified that it does not deserve rest. And believe me, this turn of events is clearly not to his taste.

Therefore, relaxation experts advise you not to rush into your homework. Get some rest first. For example, 30-40 minutes of simple idleness on the couch will allow the body to replenish some of the lost strength. In addition, our body will understand that the work has been left far behind and now we can calm down.

Eat right

Before learning to relax, a person must understand one important thing: any work consumes energy. The more energy we spend, the less it remains in our "tank". And more importantly, it is impossible to properly rest with an empty reserve. That's why correct diet- this is the key to a good day.

Thus, a small snack immediately after the end of the working day is ideal. Moreover, if the shift was very difficult, then it is best to eat in a restaurant or cafe. Firstly, you do not need to spend the rest of your energy on cooking dinner, and secondly, the relaxed atmosphere of such establishments helps to quickly forget about problems and troubles.

What we eat is also important. According to nutritionists, snacks and fruits are best in the evening. This is due to the fact that they are full of carbohydrates, which are the ideal fuel for our body. The main thing is not to overdo it in food, otherwise you will have to think about how to lose those extra pounds.

Massage is the best medicine for the body

How to relax your body after hard and exhausting work? Well, the most effective medicine is massage. It is he who allows you to relieve tension from the muscles, thereby leading a person to a state of nirvana. Therefore, if you feel that your body is on the edge, ask your soul mate to give you a general massage. Believe me, 10-15 minutes of bliss, and the body will again begin to obediently obey your orders.

However, how to relax if a person lives alone? In this case, there are two options: firstly, you can go to a special salon, and secondly, learn self-massage techniques. Naturally, the first method is more efficient, but it requires money. The second requires training, but at the same time allows you to master a skill that will stay with you forever.

What is available to everyone ...

We live in a world where everyone has a hot shower or bath. Alas, only a few people know that warm water relieves physical fatigue well. And this the best solution for those people who do not know how to relax and unwind without leaving home.

In addition, the effectiveness of this procedure can be increased by adding mineral salts to the water. They not only relieve muscle fatigue, but also give the skin a glow. Thus, you can relax well and take care of your health.

The danger that lies behind the overload of the nervous system

Unfortunately, in our country, many advice from a psychologist remains out of sight ordinary people... But it is these specialists who most of all warn about how dangerous psychological overload at work can be. For example, did you know that a lack of positive emotions inevitably leads to depression? And she, in turn, is a complex psychological disease that is rather difficult to cure in the later stages?

Therefore, everyone should know how to emotionally relax and put their thoughts in order. Fortunately, today there are many techniques and techniques that can help in this. So let's talk about how to relax and calm down in those days when it seems like the whole world is against you.

No thought about work

The problem with most people is that they cannot let go of the thought of work. Even when they are outside the office or workshop, they are still mentally in it. A string of images is circling in their minds associated with an unfinished report, offensive words from the director, or an unsuccessful order. And it is these thoughts that do not allow a person to tune in to rest, which is why the brain gradually begins to "boil."

So if you don't know how to relax after a hard day, the first thing to do is to forget about it. Just put it out of your head. Understand that today you will no longer be able to solve these problems, and therefore there is no point in winding yourself up again. Establish a rule: to solve all matters only during working hours, and devote all free minutes only to yourself and your loved ones.

Add more colors

How to relax if your whole life is a gray canvas? When the only entertainment after work is watching TV or hours of monitoring social networks? If you really want to get rid of emotional fatigue, add bright colors to your life.

At the same time, you should not take this advice as a call to engage in extreme sports. Not! You can get pleasure even without risking your own life. For example, go to the cinema or theater. Believe me, the world is full of interesting things that are worth your attention. This is especially necessary when the day turned out to be worse than ever.

Perhaps someone will say that this requires strength, of which very little remains after work. But the truth is that it would be much better to gather the will into a fist and go to unwind in the park than to feel sorry for yourself and suffer the whole evening from bad thoughts in own apartment... Just catch yourself thinking that time is fleeting, and therefore it must be spent with maximum benefit for yourself.

You are not alone!

Another little trick is that it is best to relax with friends or with loved ones. After all, it is communication that helps a person to forget about his problems, work, and even about fatigue. Therefore, if you are overwhelmed, call someone and arrange a walk together.

It doesn't matter where the meeting will take place: in a bar, park, pizzeria, near a fountain or at home. The main thing is that the people around you bring you happiness. However, remember that on days like these, it's best to avoid those friends who like to complain about their life. Otherwise, you will not be able to relax, since the problems of others will only aggravate the situation.

What is meditation?

Previously, only the sages of the East were privy to the secrets of meditation techniques. And although today the veil of secrecy has been lifted, people still do not use this amazing technique. The point is that they simply do not believe in its relaxing power or they do not have the patience to master it. But it is she who is the best way to relieve both mental and physical stress.

Therefore, if you have a very hard job, do not be lazy and learn at least the simplest form of meditation. Believe me, it won't take long, but the effect of this will exceed all your hopes and expectations.

What not to do, or How to relax without bad habits?

Finally, let's talk about what not to do. To begin with, many do not know how to relax without alcohol. For some reason, in our country there is a wrong opinion that this particular drink is the best way to relieve mental and physical fatigue. However, any doctor will tell you that this is not the case.

Indeed, in fact, alcohol only overloads the body, not allowing it to move away from daytime stress. Thus, instead of relaxation, a person receives another test, after which he will feel even worse. Therefore, on such days it is better to protect yourself from alcohol, leaving it until better times.

Switch to fresh juice instead. It will not only allow you to replenish your energy reserve, but will cheer you up due to the vitamins it contains. In addition, an excess of juice in the body does not lead to an acute headache in the morning, which is also nice.

How to relax

How to learn to relax and what methods of relaxation are there? Jacobson relaxation + very effective technique.

How can you relax? Several ways. All of them are effective and proven by practice, you can try and choose the method that suits you physiologically or just more to your liking.

Note that if one method does not give you the desired result, you must try another. We are all different, and often little things also play a significant role, everyone needs to find their own.

But there are also basic, primary methods of relaxation, which are important to remember and apply periodically. Some of them, such as relaxing breathing, mindfulness practice and "Jacobson relaxation", I will describe in the article.

So, all the methods of relaxation that will be discussed: breath; active aggression- do not hold back anger, throw out the accumulated negative; well known method relaxation according to Jacobson deserves special attention; concentration on methodical classes; the exercise elbow swing promotes relaxation, also good way improve blood supply to the brain; trance- as a way to relax and lucid observation practice behind yourself.

So, how to learn to relax and ways to relax.

1 Breath- this is so important for us that you can write about it separately and a lot. Note that we breathe differently in different states.
and if one breath allows us to calm down and even (using the breathing technique correctly) get out of a very nervous and tense state, then another breath, on the contrary, can lead from a serene one to stress.

Breathing exercise.

We turn our attention from any thoughts to our breathing. Relax your facial muscles, straighten your shoulders and take a deep breath at your normal pace. In this case, we take air not into the chest, but more into the stomach. Imagine eating apples and bloating. Then we hold our breath for 3-5 seconds and exhale slowly.

The exhalation should be about a third of the time longer than the inhalation. We do it with short delays between each inhalation and exhalation (2-3 seconds). We repeat inhale - hold - exhale - hold, so 5-6 times. This can be done both with the nose and with the mouth, without straining too much. Inhaling, you mobilize your resources and fill the blood and organs with oxygen, and when you exhale, relaxation itself occurs, you exhale tension.

Relaxing breathing should not be intermittent; during the process of inhaling and exhaling, try to keep everything flowing smoothly.

And after you have taken the first 5-6 deep breaths and exhalations, you stop interfering with this process altogether, breathing now happens by itself, you are only watching him without trying to influence him, let the body choose the rhythm it needs.

Try to trace your breathing at least occasionally throughout the day. This is important, do this exercise often, even if you are completely calm, let correct, deep and unhurried breathing become your beneficial, relaxing habit.

And learn to concentrate on your breathing all your attention, then the relaxation effect will be much stronger.

One of the most effective methods is active aggression.

The known method has been used for a long time. In my experience, a gym is good for this, and not only for men, but also for women. Also martial arts classes. But if this is not about you, then we just find a whipping toy. By the way, you can use your "husband" (wife), the main thing is that you don't mind and understand the jokes.

So, find something that you do not mind breaking, beating and splitting, and with passion we do this, while it is desirable to shout. A scream is a great way to quickly throw out all the negativity and relax. This is especially important for those who do not know how (are afraid) to express their emotions and constantly suppress them, accumulate in themselves. After all, emotional energy does not go anywhere, but accumulates inside, which makes it even harder. I will not persuade you, but find at least occasionally a place and time to throw out the gathered experiences.

Screaming in general has many of its functions, for example, screaming can warm yourself up, give yourself more courage and even raise adrenaline. In other cases, by shouting and swearing well, throw out unnecessary rage.

This method of active aggression is not suitable everywhere and not always, but to get rid of accumulated negative emotions such as, this is one of better ways how to relax quickly and get rid of the stress.

Jacobson relaxation

Edmund Jacobsan's technique is based on the preliminary tension of the muscles of the body and their subsequent relaxation. For about 10 seconds, alternately tighten the muscles of the face, neck, hands, back, abdomen, shoulders, groin and feet. Next, we relax the muscles involved and try to feel the resulting relaxation.

Recommendations. First. We strain various parts (muscles) of the face, hold the face for 8-10 seconds and relax. It relieves tension well, relaxes and improves facial expressions, as well as improves blood circulation in cells. And don't be intimidated by the thought that exercise can contribute to the appearance of wrinkles, it is not. Exercise as, has a positive effect on appearance skin.

Second. Take a cylindrical object so that it fits well in the palm of your hand, and squeeze it with force for 8-10 seconds, then slowly relax your hands and try to feel this pleasant sensation of relaxation. Do not be lazy and do this exercise at least 5 times a day for 1-2 weeks, it will well reduce the overall level of anxiety.

And what is important, after doing it, immediately try to feel this very pleasant relaxation for 1.5 - 2 minutes. The body subconsciously remembers this relaxed state, and then it will be easier to return to it.

I repeat, do this exercise for the first time 5 times a day, it is important to get rid of the old ones, chronic blocks and reduce anxiety. Then it is enough to do it 2 times a day for prevention or when you feel that you need it. I do not forget and always do these exercises.

Note. Exercise is contraindicated in cores (if the disease is confirmed by doctors). In your case, another relaxing exercise is suitable. stretching... To do this, we lie down on the floor or a bed and stretch out with effort, stretching and bending the neck, arms, legs, back as much as possible. To do it correctly, remember yourself when you woke up, yawning and stretching.

This exercise is weaker, so you need to do it 1.5 times more often than the previous one, also every day. The same 8-10 seconds are performed.

By the way, these exercises will still help well with osteochondrosis. My assistant Evgenia wrote about this in detail. If the topic is relevant to you, read on.

How to relax while working or in any other place and situation? We use the hands as described above.This is a way to relieve tension without worrying that someone will see something, do not forget about breathing.

Other techniques to relax

Concentration on a methodical lesson... I will say just a few words, since I already wrote about this in another article, and you can find out more by clicking on.

The purpose of this method: to smoothly (without struggle) switch from negative thoughts to something more pleasant and useful, some kind of activity.

In the head, two ideas or objects cannot be present at the same time to their fullest extent. One thing will still attract a lot of psychological activity. Therefore, it is important to learn soft to displace the unnecessary to us, replacing it with something useful, and to do so that this useful gradually enthralls (becomes interesting), and after a while you may notice how the negative has lost its strength and sharpness.

The state of passive observation of everything that happens.

Entering this light trance (meditation) state promotes mental calm and relaxation.

It is not difficult to enter this state, it is much more difficult to remain in it. Tired physically or mentally, we ourselves do this when we fall into a chair and stop thinking about anything, close our eyes and mentally sink into our sensations, involuntarily setting ourselves up for rest, but at the same time we do not fall asleep.

Either from the sidelines, we simply observe a certain point (object, etc.) for a long time, or we follow the thought process, but do not analyze what is happening, but only watching everything. You can enter this state of mindful observation at will at any time.

We sit in a chair, close our eyes, while our mental activity continues to work, thoughts flow in the direction of problems, some deeds, etc. And now we slow down and smoothly turn off any internal dialogue with ourselves and transfer attention to sensations in the body, trying to cover the whole body with attention from the crown to the feet.

Feelings can be different, unpleasant and pleasant. Now it is important to shift your attention and start observing just pleasant sensations or some kind of visualizations (pleasant images). The flow of thoughts is smooth and superficial, and we only observe everything.

It may be difficult to switch attention from the negative, or some thoughts will not go out of my head. It is important here not to fight this in any way, not to drive them away, but simply to turn your attention back to pleasant sensations or breathing. Simply, without analyzing anything, we observe the breath and pleasant sensations in the body.

Exercise is based on observing any pleasant sensation, the heaviness of the arms and legs, the ambient comfortable temperature, on subtle throbbing, twitching or some other light sensation in any part of the body.

Feel this comfort and observe this comfort as if floating above your sensations. Thinking itself will gradually be drawn to the pleasant, and you just watch it.

The state of passive, naked observation is our natural, natural and most important, healing state. For maximum benefit, I recommend an excellent practice for mindfulness and relaxation, in which you will learn not only to observe the pleasant, but also to all your emotions, thoughts and states, this teaches awareness in life and acceptance of the present moment, acceptance of all your feelings.

Finally: how to learn to relax

Music and specials relaxation, sounds recorded on discs are also very effective and can serve as a relaxing element, complement some relaxation techniques.

Also for relieving fatigue and raising the tone, I recommend cold and hot shower. How to correctly and what you need to know read on

Massage and bathing with special oils and gels is also a good way to tidy up the nervous system.

Best regards, Andrey Russkikh

Relaxing melody

Try not to think about anything, leave problems and things for later, just listen carefully, but calmly, without stress, this will allow you to deeply relax and relax mentally

Have people ever told you that you are too stressed? Did you feel like you can't relax while everyone around you is having fun and fooling around? Would you like to sometimes understand what the joke is about? If so, it's time to put on your sweatpants, put your anxiety away and learn to relax! If you want to learn how to turn from a nail biting neurasthenic into a carefree girl who does not care about anything other than sunsets, then, for a start, see Point 1

Steps

Change your priorities

Accept that you cannot control everything. One of the many reasons people cannot relax is because they try to control every situation. They try to predict exactly what will happen and when. They try to imagine when they achieve something, how their best friend / boss / parents will react to it, they believe that they know what they need to do to get their way. Unfortunately, life is different. It is filled with surprises, both good and bad. If you want to relax, you have to learn to expect the unexpected.

• You need to go to this in small steps. One way is to first learn to think about possible scenarios. Let's say you are waiting for a promotion. Instead of thinking about getting one, think about other scenarios and how you will react to them - you may still get a promotion soon or you will be told that you need to work better and harder to get it. Whatever happens, you will be less nervous if you are prepared for such an “unexpected” situation.
• There are things you cannot prepare for in advance. Perhaps you and your friend are on your way to a romantic getaway and your car breaks down. This is bad, but sometimes you need to be able to laugh at things that you cannot control.
• Stop being a micro-planner. If you obsessively schedule every 15 minutes of your day, then you are guaranteed to be upset when something goes wrong.

1. Move away from unrealistic standards. This is another reason why you will not be able to relax. You might think that everyone will behave well 24/7. You think that your teacher, friends, boss, or someone else in your life can read your mind all the time. Perhaps you think the world will give you everything you deserve. Well then, you have to learn to acknowledge the imperfection of the world around you; if you want to determine how everyone around you will behave, then you should play SIMS.

   • Once you stop expecting people to behave the way you want, you will be pleasantly surprised when they exceed your expectations.
   • People are not perfect. Sometimes they will be rude, insensitive and not quite ready mentally. And that's okay. And here we go back to "letting go of control" - drop your high expectations and you are guaranteed to relax.
   • It also implies moving away from impossible standards for oneself. If you expect yourself to be the CEO / Oscar-winning star / bestselling author before you turn 25, then you're doomed to be stressed and frustrated when that doesn't happen.

2. . Don't be afraid to make mistakes. Constantly stressed people get nervous when something they planned does not go according to their plan due to a small or big mistake they have made. You must learn to take mistakes as lessons, not beat yourself up for not doing something as well as you could. Mistakes are an integral part of our life and life would not be fun if we all performed the tasks assigned to us like robots. If you make a mistake, think about what you learned from this experience and what you would do differently in the future, and how you will apply this knowledge.

   • People who cannot relax are so fixated on their ideality that they feel like big losers if they make a mistake somewhere.

3. Learn to let things take their course. A person who does not know how to relax pays attention to all the little things that other people do wrong and to every little character flaw in the people around them. Sure, Kate got drunk at your birthday party, your lab partner didn't do some of his work, that's bad, but how much energy are you going to spend on your desire to change other people's behavior? The answer is not at all. Learn to take a deep breath and accept the fact that the world is full of different people and move on.

   • If someone is acting really annoying and it drives you crazy, go out. toilet room, take a breath and learn not to pay attention. The worst thing you can do is tell everyone within a 25-mile radius of how much someone's behavior irritates you; talking about it will only make you look even more stressed and ruin your mood.
   • Try to think on the merits of things. Will Bill's antics or Mallory's big mouth annoy you in 12 hours? If so, why not stop worrying about it now?

4. Be realistic about your expectations in certain situations. It will also help you relax a little. Before you face a life situation, imagine what possible scenarios might happen against your expectations, and it will be easier for you to get over what happened. Let's say you're throwing yourself a birthday party. Best case: everyone will come and it will be the coolest party ever, people will talk about it for years, etc. But most likely: some things will go wrong. Perhaps the people who were supposed to come will not be able to do this, some guests will find that five glasses of tequila is too much and will fall on your bookshelf and your nervous breakdown will look bad. The more options you have in your head, the more likely you will not be so annoyed if things don't go the way you planned.

   • This is not to say that you shouldn't think positively and expect better. But knowing your options will make you less clamorous and won't worry if something not so good happens.

5. Don't be too serious about yourself. This is another trait shared by people who cannot relax. You may have difficulty recognizing crisis situations, understanding when someone is just teasing you, or even becoming aware of your phobias because you think you are too serious, a busy person who cannot be distracted by things like your own. limitations. List your flaws and learn to laugh at them! It is better to understand your weaknesses yourself than if someone points out them.

   • The key is not to be so sensitive. If you cry over every little thing that is said about you, the people around you will also not be able to relax. You don't want to be the kind of person that keeps everyone from having a little fun, do you?

6. Look at everything from the outside. Another method to learn to relax is to understand where all these annoying people are coming from. So Masha got drunk on your birthday and tried to flirt with your lamp. It might be annoying, but remember that she was dumped by her boyfriend last week and since then she's not herself. Maybe Mark didn't do his part of the project on time, but don't forget that he is caring for his sick mother and is in difficult situation... People are people, and if you think about the reasons why they did not behave the way you would like, perhaps you would perceive their behavior with more understanding.

   • This does not mean that you can always find an excuse to justify bad behavior. But more often than not, if you dig a little deeper, you will find an explanation for this. And this is how people who cannot relax should live.

   We act

   1. Have fun without thinking. You can have fun sometimes and still consider yourself smart and serious. Go bowling. Play charades. Get drunk sometimes and giggle with your girlfriends. Try on funny costumes. Run along the beach. Do something that requires 0% of your brain activity. It's nice. Let all the excitement and ambition go away and live in the moment. Living for one day and being frivolous, you will feel much happier and ultimately relaxed.

      • Be spontaneous. You don't need to plan when to have fun. If you're hanging out with your friends and don't feel like talking about your stocks, then have fun!
      • Do something completely new. Take salsa lessons, go to a comedy show, or have fun getting temporary tattoos on your friends' faces. If it’s a fifth grader’s action, it’s even better!

   2. Learn to accept jokes. This is the key to relaxation. If someone teases you, makes fun of you, or jokes about the phrase you said, learn to laugh at it too - or at least respond with the same coin! If you can't take jokes in your direction all the time, even if they are harmless, then you will have a reputation for being boring and there will be no opportunity for others to have fun around you. Laugh at yourself, agree with the joke, and bring it back. If the joke was really about hurting you, then you have every right to be offended, but as a rule, people are just trying to keep you on your toes and show that no one is perfect!

      Break the rules. This does not mean that you should open someone's car or steal an iPod. This means that you have to stop following the rules so strictly that when you see someone break them, you go crazy. This means that you yourself must break them a little, if you have the opportunity. Skip school or work if it helps you achieve desired result... Don't do every bullet to bullet task. Sometimes it is very pleasant to do something not the way everyone wants it from you 100% of the time, but in your own way.

      • And if you are hanging out with friends who behave a little irresponsibly - drinking more than is required, speeding or being rude in the window for servicing a car - then of course, you are the right person who should say: "Stop it guys!", Or you you can let them do it and make sure nothing bad happens.

   3. Take a break. Sometimes you need to take a break from work in order to really relax. If you feel like you are as tense as a drum during work, school or even while having fun with friends, then you need some time to cool down, go outside, look at the photo. funny cats or do something that will make you feel normal again. There is nothing wrong with taking a break from work, it does not indicate weakness. If a break during work helps you to relieve stress - go ahead!

      • If you are an A person, you think you cannot take a half-hour break until the job is done, but to be realistic, after a half-hour break and rest, you might be able to do the job better and more easily and with much better. results.

   4. Relax. The reason why you cannot relax may be chronic fatigue that you are not even aware of. If you are rested and energized and in a positive mood for the whole day, then even the simplest test will not upset you. Aim for 7-8 hours of sleep daily and try to fall asleep and wake up at the same time every evening and every morning. Limit the amount of caffeine in the afternoon so you don't feel agitated when it's time to go to bed. These small changes can make a huge difference in the way you see the world.

      • If you really feel jaded in the middle of the day, don't underestimate the power of a small but productive 15-20 minute nap to reboot your system.

   5. Go outside. Even if you just go outside to get some air or take a walk every day for at least 20 minutes, it will make you feel more relaxed, more peaceful, and in harmony with the world around you. Make sure you go outside at least 2-3 times a day, especially if you work from home or are going to be in the house most of the time. You will be surprised how much more relaxed and calm you will be just being on the street, and how much less annoyed you will be from various kinds of troubles.

      Spend time with relaxed people. It is very important. If you want to truly be relaxed and not obsessed with your own ideal, you need to spend time with people who are a little more relaxed than you. They don't have to be guitar-playing hippies, but people who are less constrained and pay less attention to the little details in life, and who can be unpredictable, leaning back in their chairs if they want to. These people will get used to you and you will feel relaxed very soon.

      • And if you look at it from the other side, then if you connect with people who are even more obsessed with good grades, perfect career, etc., you are simply doomed to become even more stressful than you are.

   6. Unload your life. While cleaning the closet or organizing your desk may not seem like a path to relaxation, you will find that if you feel more organized and in control, you will feel more relaxed. You may find it very difficult to relax if you can't find something in the closet, or because you constantly lose important documents, or simply because your life is too busy. So, take a little time (at least 30 minutes a day) and start organizing the space around you, you will be surprised that you will feel a lot lighter.

   7. Exercise. By exercising, you will release excess steam, your body will get a positive attitude, and will also give you energy for the whole day. Make it a goal to exercise for at least 30 minutes every day, no matter how, by running, cycling, climbing, swimming, you will find that you can manage to burn a lot of negative, pent-up energy. To have a little laugh while you burn calories, exercise with a friend.

      • If you're stressed all the time, you may feel like you don't have time for things like exercise. But if you tweak your daily routine a little, you will see that you can find the right time for your mind and body.

7. See if you need to drastically change your life in order to relax. Perhaps your work is sucking all your life energy out of you. Perhaps your three best friends are nervous wallets that have made you nervous for no reason. Perhaps you are trying too hard to do everything exactly the way your parents want and it seems to you that you have too little room for your desires. If changing your attitude towards life and changing small details does not help you, stop and analyze what other big changes in life you need to make on the way to your happiness.

   • Create a list of everything that makes you feel unhappy and gives you stress. If you see that they all have the same source and see some pattern, it may be time to make an important move. It might be scary to do, but in the end it will make you happy!

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A whole generation has grown up that is interested in only one thing - how quickly and how much money can be raised, and in what area. For example, a guy got the profession of an anti-crisis manager, because he was thinking about money. And as a result, he did not work a single day in his specialty, killing as much as 5 years for training and a lot of money.

Today's youth study in unnecessary specialties in order to make a career at work that they don't like. Everyone is straining - teachers, professors, bosses and shareholders. Tension, moreover chronic, has become the only form of being. It's hard to imagine living a productive life while being slightly relaxed.

But the paradox is precisely in this - in order to live productively, you need to relax. From the outside, it seems that lazy people and losers who are unlucky enough to find good (understand, stressful) work live in a relaxed state.

In the process of communicating with such people, it turns out:

1. Living in a slightly relaxed state - this is life in accordance with the biorhythms of nature. The entire animal world lives according to the principle of necessary sufficiency - achievement maximum result with a minimum of effort. It never occurs to a single predator to wake up an hour earlier to fill up more meat! What's the point if you don't eat it in that amount right away? No hedgehog will pick mushrooms for other hedgehogs. Or ask them to borrow at interest.

Periodic tensions and concentration have an effect when they are temporary, and when they are needed for something specific as a tool. Moreover, it is necessary to enter into a tense pace consciously and for a while, and not be in it constantly. Nature is so conceived that the system breaks down from prolonged stress.

1. sunlight and regular stay in nature is extremely important for the psyche.

To do this, it is not necessary to leave for permanent residence in Goa or Bali or move to live in a village. Why go to extremes? If being in a concrete cage bothers you, look for affordable alternative solutions. Be on every day fresh air- combine it with business trips, shopping. Or make business / friendly calls while walking through the park.

Go to the stadium in the morning or in the evening - even if you do not like running, just walk with a sports gait - by the way, the effect of it is no worse than that of running, and the load on the heart is much less, therefore it is sparing. The figure will also qualitatively change in a month (from personal experience). Arrange such outings for yourself - you will forget about anger and negativity, and work will bring top scores and more fun.

1. More - is not always better.

Working harder doesn't mean earning more. Spending more is not an indicator better life... I repeat - the essence of relaxation is to achieve greater effect with minimal effort. According to the principle of aikido - accurately calculate the movement, make it at the right moment in the right direction - the rest will happen as if by itself.

1. Waste time deliberately, taking into account priorities.

An example with the heat, in the summer. If in your city there is a reservoir with a free beach, you can go there for a swim at least every day. This is the default and interesting thing. Anything that does not arouse interest can simply be ignored (social networks, games, correspondence about anything, etc.). All of this is turned out to be rubbish. Time should be spent with pleasure.

1. Absence fuss and unnecessary movements.

The Pareto Rule says that 20% of the effort gives 80% of the result. It remains to decide what actions are related to these 20%. In order not to perform unnecessary (read, meaningless, actions) from day to day.

In this mode, things that are really important for themselves are done. Concentration on them automatically distracts from all the husks. When this becomes a habit, the fuss disappears on its own, and the efficiency grows.

1. Important thoughts

When you drop out of the race of life, there is time for thinking about the important and the eternal. You begin to think about the issues that your hands, feet and head did not reach in the fuss. As a result, new understanding and perspectives are opened. Much is seen deeper, fewer mistakes are made, new ideas appear. When you think about your destiny, about what you really want, you start doing it - a very real feeling of happiness comes.

1. Quote "relax and have fun" It helps a lot to filter out your social circle and give yourself a mind-blowing luxury - not to communicate with those who are unpleasant. And it doesn't matter how much power and money they have, whose son, matchmaker, brother he is. If a person is unpleasant to you, you have the right not to communicate with him if he bothers you.

Surround yourself with those around whom you become better - and an amazing transformation will happen to you. More than 50% of success comes to us only when we physically change the environment. Communication with those who are better - essential condition for your personal progress whatsoever.

1. Avoid negativity - it's simple.

Accustomed to starting every morning in good mood, you begin to realize that there is no point in wasting time on negativity. It makes no sense to dull at the TV in the evenings - a "hotbed of panic", to prove your case, to get involved in topics that do not concern you personally. In a relaxed state, negativity is simply ignored. If someone is interested in throwing angry attacks, let him find another company for himself, and you will do something else.

Semyon! You even wrote your name with a small letter)), although, judging by the letter, you are a literate person! Self-esteem is underestimated, anxiety is increased - here's the diagnosis!)) I must say right away that your sad expression is very easy to correct! SMILE! When you smile, your face starts to glow)) Even if the smile is tense or tense, stretch your face into a smile, become a Cheshire cat! The face rests in a smile! When the muscles of the face are relaxed it is a smile and only three of the facial muscles are involved. If you are sad or serious, the face tenses, and almost all the muscles of the face work!

The most important thing here is not physiology, of course!)) The important thing here is: "what I'm afraid I don't know, there is still enough money, I would not say that I earn a lot, but the problem is in me" There is enough money WHILE !!! There is no satisfaction from earning money. And you should get it)) The topic of happiness and satisfaction is very extensive ... Go to a psychologist for a full-time appointment, or Skype. Until then, start small:

Yoga: I recommend breathing yoga in The Art of Living - all the information on the Internet. Yoga will give you the right ability to relax from nature, correct breathing is the basis of a healthy existence! In a healthy body healthy mind!

Breathing u-jai: Press the front wall of the throat to back wall throat only by muscular efforts, without the help of hands. Inhale-exhale ONLY through the nose, slowly and calmly. 3-10 times in a state of stress, confusion, before bedtime.

Meditation: Meditate in silence, in the morning or at lunchtime, 4 hours before bedtime.

Sit straight, arms and legs - DO NOT CROSS. The back is supported. The head is suspended (without support). Get into a comfortable position. Take a deep breath - exhale, slowly and calmly - 3 times. Say "ONE" or "OM" to yourself. Calm and even breathing. Feel the warmth of your body. Inhale, exhale deeply. Feel your navel. Inhale deeply. Disconnection from the external environment. Thoughts flowed ... We accompany thoughts like clouds or like fallen leaves ... Inhale, exhale deeply. Concentration on your navel. Complete relaxation. We feel the heaviness of our body. Relaxation.

Exit: inhale-exhale deeply, calm breathing. Wiggle your fingers and toes. Open eyes. You can get up calmly.

20 minutes of meditation replaces 4 hours of sleep.

Chuckle: stand up straight, hands along the body, inhale well and exhale sharply through the nose with the mouth closed. Repeat 3 times.

Spine. Begin by stretching your spine every morning!

Stand up straight and reach up with the top of your head! 1-2 minutes. Hands along the body. Legs together.

Relaxation! So, in order to cope with your irritation, resentment and misunderstanding, you need to have "HEALTHY SPIRIT IN A HEALTHY BODY!" from nature! We are used to relaxing with the help of TV, music, friends, alcohol, delicious food, reading books and so on ... But this is not a rest for the brain! This is a load on the brain! How do you relax? How do you think a person should relax?

If I was born in this world, then it is alone without me. It means that in someone's distant apartment someone is waiting for my sudden call. Someone is happy with my gentle smile, someone wants to be next to me. This is life ... this is the sun on a string ... This is a film where I - the main character!

Leonova Natalia Vyacheslavovna, psychologist Kaliningrad

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